Andrew had a shoot at a local company for a modeling gig.  We were supposed to be there around 3 in the afternoon--so we got there about 2:30 (Shawn was with us, so we had to be on time, had it been just me and Andrew, we would have shown up about 3:15 and blamed traffic).  There was tight security at this building, like they were making nuclear bombs in the building or something. And all they are doing is taking photographs of chil'len for advertisements in the Sunday circulars!

I'm telling you--we strolled up there and there were three security guards--all of 'em armed.  We get to the desk--and the guy wants our identification.  So we hand him our drivers licenses--now mind you--I'm all illegal cause I'm still carrying around my Louisiana driver license--even though I've been in Minnesota for the past four years.  So he quickly points out "Umh, this license is expired."  I told him "Well, I'm not driving, I'm standing here--if you were a state trooper, we'd have a problem. But since you're doing security at a photo studio, it's all good."

He rolled his eyes and started punching our names in the computer.  I'm like "Damn, are we applying for a home ownership loan or something?"  He enters our information in the system and slides our ID across the counter to us. 

At this point, we've been there fifteen minutes, cause his a$$ is typing with one finger.  I'm like "Look dude, I can see the people standing there waiting on us.  They see us here--we got a baby--we ain't coming to take any trade secrets to another photo studio, we just wanna get these pictures taken of our son in this costume so he get on the cover of y'alls product and he can get paid for his work!"

This super security officer (he should have had a cape on) looked over at us and said "Oh, I need your son's name too and all his information, he needs a security badge!"  And we had to stand there and spell out Andrew's information and everything else while he used his slow a$$ index finger to type in all the information.

Now it's 2:49 and we got there at 2:30--I can see the people from the portrait studio are pacing back and forth--waiting for us to cross the wall of security that has been set up by three dudes who clearly couldn't make the police force because their test scores were too low!

Finally, one of the photographers came out and rescued us "Hey there Chang, these people have been standing here for nearly 30 minutes. Why don't we just let 'em in?"

"Oh no!" He told 'em "I got a job to do and I'm gonna do it!"

So for the next five minutes or so--we sit and wait--and wait and sit--while Chang took his sweet time and punched in Andrew's information.

It's 5 minutes after three when he gives us temporary badges that we were sternly told to be worn around our necks.  I snatched them out of his hands and said "Thanks for nothing.  While you're sniffing up our butts and taking all this information down, about five or six people have walked through here without you so much as looking in their direction!"  I wanted to walk right past him in the first place, but Shawn wanted to do things "the right way".

I know about security officers--anybody who wants to call himself a "security officer" instead of a "security guard" has issues from the jump!  I wanted to fight Chang when it was all said and done--but Shawn told me not to cuss him out--since we wanted to be invited back later for more modeling jobs for Andrew.  So as we were walking past him, I said "Oh you must have forgot to tell me to spread my butt cheeks and cough! Or how about a swab of my DNA?  I don't think I gave you a finger print!"

When we finally got past the guard desk, one of the photographers was like "I'm so sorry.  Chang is just like that.  I came to work this morning 2 minutes to 6 o'clock (and I am supposed to be here at 6) and he wouldn't let me in.  Because nobody is supposed to enter the building before 6 a.m."

Chang is really wasting his God given talent to frustrate people and keep them from places they are supposed to go.  He should quit working at the portrait studio and get him a job at the White House!