The flight to Houston from Minneapolis ain't but 3 hours, and I've spent the last four hours searching for airfare on line that I can afford. Ain't that a damn shame? I am spending more hours LOOKING for fares than the plane ride actually is!  And I've gone to all the search engines, looking at alternating dates--even looked at different cities--hell, at this point, I'd have to drive to Canada to fly to Houston in order to be able to afford it. FOR REAL, it's cheaper if I drive to Canada, park, get on a plane and fly to Texas.

At first, I had standards, I'd only fly Continental Airlines. They have free refreshments and they give you a pillow and a blanket.  Plus, they got a cool new fleet of jets that have televisions and in-flight movies.  But then, I had to lower my standards and dip into Sun Country Airlines.  They make you load your own damn bags on the plane.  They don't even tell you on the intercom when the plane is taking off, you just better be looking, when you see the engine crank up, you'd better run out there and hop on board.  Ain't no flight attendants either--you gotta fix your own drinks--the bar is self serve!  You gotta bring your own toilet paper and hand soap for the restrooms. It's like riding a Greyhound bus with wings!

And there is no low cost carrier here in the Twin Cities--ain't no Southwest Airlines! Cause Northwest Airlines has a hub here--and I hear tales that in their agreement that they signed so many moons ago, the city agreed that they wouldn't put a low cost carrier like Southwest so Northwest wouldn't have anybody to undercut them.  Northwest promised to stay in Minnesota forever and employ 'bout 50 million people. Well, just last week, Delta bought out the airline and they are moving their operations to Atlanta. 

When I first got to the Twin Cities four years ago, a flight to get home to see my kin folks was probably about $233!  Man I was going home once every four months.  But then, I noticed a trend, air fare kept going up and up and before I knew it, a few years later, the price was $380.  I told myself "Alright, I'll go home less frequently and for emergencies only."

Then, before I knew it, flights were $450, at that point I declared, "It'd be cheaper if we just drove down south." Until gas prices were predicted to go over $4 a gallon this summer. 

And now, I go on line tonight, to try to get to Houston so I can hang with my momma 'nem for 4th of July (and dip down to New Orleans for a few days and catch the Essence Music Festival), and everybody, even old raggedy a$$ Sun Country Airlines wants $550 a ticket.  And that's if the plane stops for gas and give the pilot a chance to take a cigarette break in Chicago or some damn where!  It's not even a direct flight for that price.

I thought "Surely, this must be an error."  So I went on line to all the search engines and it is so for real.  I can not get to Houston to see my momma for less than a grand.  I have been looking on line since midnight, I ain't been to sleep y'all--cause I ain't believing this $hit!  I thought surely, if I stayed on line long enough, I'd find a deal--NOT!

Needless to say, I won't be seeing my momma or daddy any time soon.  Man, the cost of a flight is breaking up black families like slavery.  Remember in the television movie "Roots", black folks would get separated and sold from one plantation to the next--never seeing their kin again?  Well, that's what the airlines are doing!  I'm on the Minneapolis plantation, my momma is on the plantation in Houston--and ain't no way I'm gonna see her unless'en I get my black a$$ on the underground railroad, also known as Amtrak!

And even Amtrak is raising their ticket prices.  Last year, just for fun, we were looking at riding the train to Chicago, to visit Shawn's Uncle Sam, and it was probably about $60 a piece.  Mannnnnnnnnnn, we looked at that same damn ticket two days ago and it's triple that price! 

I'm just frustrated, and I can't be the only one.  These airlines are backing folks into a corner and we're gonna come out swinging--and find creative ways to beat the system!  I thought about putting all of us in a FedEx box with bubble wrap around Andrew so he wouldn't get damaged--and shipping us overnight!  Then Shawn entertained the idea of stowing away--put Andrew in a little doggy carry on cart with some snacks and water inside--I'd get in a hanging garment bag and since Shawn is more limber than I am (he does yoga and aerobics), he'll fold himself up and get in a large suitcase!

Y'all playing, but I'm serious! Drastic times call for drastic measures.  I'm gonna go upstairs and get a few hours of sleep before Andrew wakes up--then I'm gonna see if he can still fit that pug costume from last Halloween.