My husband came home from work the other day and told me about a big news story--I nearly fell out my seat when I found out that an 18 year old baby sitter let the two kids she was supposed to be caring for wander off and drown in a pond while she took a nap. (NOTE TO SELF: Ain't gonna be no baby sitters under the age of 45 for my son.  Cause if I come home and Andrew is face up in a pond--she gonna be face down on the ground with smoke coming from her back.  The mortician will bring her momma a crisply folded flag. 

That heffa was supposed to be babysitting the kids--not napping!  You don't get paid to sleep on the job.  That heffa can sleep when she gets home--she got paid to sit those kids--not to call hogs in her sleep.

That's why only women who qualify for AARP benefits can keep my kids--something about old ladies--they know babies--and they know how to take care of 'em. They ain't gonna be falling asleep or mistreating the kids. That just ain't gonna happen.

But these young girls--they come to the house--talk on the phone--fall asleep--don't watch your kids--you come home from the club and the baby is wearing the same diaper that he had on when you left him.  See--that right there is enough to get you a case--and y'all know I already got five restraining orders--I do one more thing and they are throwing me in the hole.

Which is why ain't no baby sitters coming here to watch Andrew--we go out to the local watering hole--we pull the high chair right up to the bar.  We want to do a romantic dinner--high chair included. Everything is done as a family.  'Cause I don't need no 18-year old sitter mistreating my little one. 

Oh, that ain't even what I'm supposed to be talking about today--my friend Chris--asked me the other day if we could talk about something other than Shawn and Andrew--I was stumped--the phone went dead for at least 30 seconds. My response:  "I can not accommodate you on that one."

I ain't realize it until then--but that's all I do--so that's all I gotta talk about--my man and my baby. Chris is like "When you get some more interesting $hit going on in your life, call me."

If he wasn't such a good friend--and my son's god-father--I swear I'd cut him off.  But Chris has been known over the past 10 years of our friendship to be brutally honest with me about everything, and I do mean everything.

That day I waited to see who'd call me. The phone rang a few times, mostly bill collectors and people with exciting new offers--not one friend.  Finally my husband called--just to check in to see how we were doing.  After that--I saw spiders making a web around the receiver--cause I never touched it.

Since I dedicated my life to being a wife and momma (also known in some circles as "slave"), I've been so preoccupied with my duties on the home-front, that I don't have time for friends anymore.  Everybody is gone--off doing their own thing.  Oh we talk occasionally and do a few e-mails with Andrew's photos of course--but good solid friendships and long phone conversations debating the philosophies have disappeared.

How do you continue to foster friendships and take care of your infant child, try to bathe every day and still do those things that will please your husband? I don't' know how to find that balance--cause now--I'm consumed with baby and my boo.

And that ain't a bad thing--I enjoy my new role--but I knew things were changing when Fanchon, my best friend of 25 years couldn't remember my phone number the other day.  This girl and I have talked every morning--no matter what--since the day we met in 6th grade. And now, she don't recall the digits.  She got three kids-I'm trying to figure out how she talked to me every day while she was raising hers (cause they damn near grown now). 

But wait, now that I think about it--I recall one day when Fanchon declared we couldn't talk every morning anymore for a while--because she had to get her kids ready for school.  My friend Chasity did the same thing--she got two small boys--and we talk occasionally--but she's usually rushing to t-ball practice or just getting back from karate--so our conversations are brief to non-existent.  I called my friend Angela just last night to check in and see how she was doing--our conversation was cut short within minutes of saying "hello" when he daughter Chelsea decided to turn the bath tub into a swimming pool.

I guess life is changing for all of us who embark on this thing called "motherhood".  Ole' Chris will see soon when he and Amber start planting seed and gathering a harvest of little Williamseses.