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View Article  I didn't go to college to clean $hit..
OK, it's been officially two weeks since I left the work force and became a full time stay at home mom. I'm bout to lose my damn mind! I put on a business suit yesterday, picked up my briefcase and got in the car. I just rode around pretending I had some where to be. I thought to myself "I spent 10 years in college getting a 4 year degree, and my wages are being garnished with student loans. All that education prepared me for changing pampers and playing blocks."   more »
View Article  White mommas are gonna make us act right...
one way or the other. Either that or they are going to make us shame! My friend Tamara called the other day all embarassed... she's in a play group and of course, she's the only black woman in the group (cause sisters are at work, not playing). She said she got to lunch and all the white mommas had designer diaper bags and snacks and fancy trinkets for their kids to play with. Tam, on the other hand, forgot her kids' snacks at home, had to borrow Cheeze Its from another mom and her diaper bag broke...   more »
View Article  I gotta watch my language...
cause Andrew is picking up every little word that I say--especially ones he ain't supposed to be saying! He's so smart that I gotta be careful--cause Shawn is gonna start beating me up for being so ghetto. The other day, he was reading Andrew a book--and suddently things took a turn for the worst when Andrew started yelling out "Ni@@er"! I had to run and hide...   more »
View Article  Trying to keep up with white folks...
is getting a little expensive. All the kids in our play group are signed up for swim lessons--well I decided to call the local swim school to get him enrolled--YEAH RIGHT! Child, they want $200 for a 30-minute class that only meets three days a week. If I put him in swim class, he ain't gonna eat for two weeks, I tell you that!   more »
View Article  My friend Chris wants to know...
if I can have a conversation with him WITHOUT talking about Andrew or Shawn. The answer to his question: HELL TO THE NO! That's all I'm doing these days so that's all I got to talk about; being a momma and being a wife. If there is anything else going on in the world--unless it's wrapped up in a poopy diaper--I don't know nothin' 'bout it.   more »
View Article  It's Sunday--so you know I gotta take y'all to church!
So Andrew had been struggling with what we thought was a cold. We had given him everything from Vicks Vapor Rub on his chest to momma's old school "onion hanging over the bed" remedy--neither of which worked--but they both left my house with a putrid smell. But by the grace of God yesterday--we found out it was an infection!   more »
View Article  Old school remedies don't always work...
I need y'alls help. My poor son is so congested--he's got snot dripping out of his nose and his chest is full of flem. The doctor's line is busy--I left a message! And God forbid--I made the mistake of calling my mother in law and my own damn momma last night--and my house smells like garlic and onions--cause that's what I had hanging over his bed for 10-hours. SURPRISE: neither of those ghetto remedies worked.   more »
View Article  Lord, I dropped my baby....
Heading down the stairs this morning--I lost my footing and dropped my baby. I'm still in shock--he cried for 30 minutes and I cried for an hour and thirty minutes. He's fine--but I swear--he aint' say this--but the look on Shawn's face made me fell like he thinks I did it on purpose or something...   more »
View Article  Oh taste and see...
Now he knows what I been going through! Shawn had to keep the baby for 12-hours while I pulled a long shift at work. When I got home, Andrew had beaten his daddy to a pulp--mentally and physically. I remember last week Shawn came home from work and ask me: "So, what do you do all day that you can't keep your hair combed?" Now he KNOWS!   more »
View Article  No punching out on the motherhood time clock...
I’m typing with one hand, ’cause the other hand is holding an eight-ounce bottle of formula. My son Andrew doesn’t care about deadlines. I’m a stay-at-home mom and part-time comedian, but nothing humorous is going on right now - motherhood ain’t no joke. I ain’t had a bath in five days, can’t remember the last time I was able to brush my teeth, and my feet are so crusty, when I went to bed the other night, my husband Shawn thought I had on socks.   more »
View Article  Last Comic Standing is in town...
And I'm changing diapers! My poor little Andrew is battling through his first set of teeth.... and that's wreaking havoc on my chances of getting up out of here to get in line and audition for the judges. On the way out the door--he baked four cakes and a batch of muffins...   more »
View Article  Good mommy VS Bad Mommy....
There is a reason my son has his own case worker with social services... cause I got a constant battle going on in my head: Good Mommy versus Bad Mommy; and sad to say, bad mommy has a mean left hook--so she often wins!   more »
View Article  Andrew is Steppin' in The Name of Love

My baby son is constantly going R Kelly on me when I try to change his diaper. But not to worry... I'm keeping a log and plan to pay him back as soon as I turn 60 and lose control of my bladder.   more »